Post by Orochimaru on Aug 7, 2007 11:01:55 GMT -5
I was having fun last night with Suigetsu and making some comedy jokes with Orochimaru and his character of the sound 5, Korikatama Kekkan. I figured since that worked so well I might as well try and do a comedy routine of my own. Tell me what yall think.
A day in Orochimaru's Layer.
Orochimaru wakes up with his hair going in 15 different directions and his makeup smeared. He looked over and sees a dead deer lieing in bead next to him with a hole in its neck.
"WHEN THE HELL DID THAT GET THERE?!?!?!?!
Oh wait that was dinner last night." He preceeds to swallow the deer hole and walk into the shower. He goes to his private shower room and looks in seeing its destroyed. It has mud everywhere and all sorts of hair on the ground.
"WHOS BEEN USING MY PRIVATE SHOWERRRRR!!!!!!!" He yells as he looks around. He then preceeds to take the next hour waiting outside the regular showers to take one, with every other member of the staff.
"Im Orochimaru I shouldn't haft to stand here waiting to use a damn shower I should be the one to use the shower first. I need to have a meeting about this." He mubbles and a small voice in his head says,
"Yeah like meetings ever solve anything."
"SHUT UP VOICES IN MY HEAD!!!!! Oh wait thats Kabuto, Hay Kabuto can you clean up in their its kinda fogged up."
Suddenly we zoom into Orochimarus brain where Kabuto is finalyl enjoying his vacation away from Orochimaru.
"Aww man I was hoping he'd forget about me. Jees he takes over my body and ya think that would satisfy him enough. But nooo he now wants me to clean his brain. Wait how do you clean a brain."
"Cleaning supplies are in the closet next to you. Make sure the floors are clean." Orochimaru says from outside with everyone stairing at him.
"Floors? Closet?" Kabuto says then suddenly looks around and sees hes in a massive room with a single closet.
"WHEN DID ALL THIS GET IN HERE!?!?!?!?!?!?"
After a very long shower in which Orochimaru spent most of it Fighting his hair to go to normal. He preceeded back to his room to finish the remains of his dear he couldn't swallow and apply his makeup. He walks in to see someone with red eyes in his room.
"Sasuke I see you have returned to finish the job. Well im ready for you cause I have this!!!!"
Holds up naked picture of Sakura.
"Uh Orochimaru why do you have a naked picture of a girl?" Said one of his servents as he flicked on the lights.
"You know I don't really know." Tosses picture away and finishs getting ready. The first part of the morning is always devoted to meetings with the Nobles.
"As you can see we have grown much in power recently and would be honored if you would back USSS!" With that Orochimaru is pushed out of his chair by two little girls, Ryoko and Suchi.
"Chairs? My only weakness?" Orochimaru says as he scrambles to get up.
"Hi Oro-Sensei. When we gonn a TRAIN!!!!!!" The girls say in unison as they run around the desk saying, "Training training, were gonn be training YAY!!!!"
"I AM NOT RUNNING A DAYCARE SERVICE NOW GO BOTHER SOMEONE ELSE!!! Jess i have a whole base and those two haft to come in and bother me." Orochimaru says and suddenly turns around to see the noble dead with his blood being pulled out and into Korikatama Kekkan.
"Kekkan WHY DID YOU KILL THE NOBLE!!!!"
"Don't know, was kinda hugnry for breakfast. You can bring em back can't you? Just do the whole your my slave thing and you get the nobles support."
"THATS NOT THE POI- Oh wait your right, why didn't i think of that. Ah well my Idea now?"
At lunch time Orochimaru went into the office work room, since it was an evil lair there was no kitchen for the regular staff and if people wanted something they bought it themselves. The room was massive with a PS3 in the conner (Though we have yet to figure out how Orochimaru got a PS3 into the Naruo world). On the screen you see Naruto Fighting Orochimaru with two members of the sound 5, Tishaka Suji (the leader) playing Orochimaru and Shibata Bishamon Playing as Naruto.
"I got you Now NARUTO!!!" Yells Suji as he keeps playin the controls.
"Not if i use RASANGAN!!!" Presses buttons and activates rasangan killing Orochimaru.
"Tell me why did I appoint you leader of the sound 5 if you CANT EVEN BEAT YOUR SUBORDINATE IN VIDEO GAMES!!!"
"Uhhh bad character?" Suji says with a look of confusion. "Shoulda Picked Sasuke."
Orochimaru walks to the fridge with an already anoyed look on his face and opens it. He had been craving his massive rice Bowl all day and had cleaned out a massive segment of the fridge specifically devoted to it. Yet again we have no idea how Orochimaru gets these things it just better to not ask.
He opens the fridge to look and side and see his rice bowl missing.
"Oh you have got to be kidding me. KEKKAN!!!!!!!!!" Orochimaru yells.
"Im going to the ramen shop Ill be back later." Orochimaru says as he walks out of the room with Naruto walking on the screen to his Ramen shop.
After a Delicous time at the Ramen shop Orochimaru returns happy and ready to have a base wide meeting.
At the meeting.
"Now I know know you all are wondering why I have called you to this meeting. The answer is simple, someone has been eating ALL OF MY FOOD!!! I dont care who it is, I want them found and brought to me. Hay where did Kekkan go, he was just here a minute ago. That man and his stomach, he must need to eat all the time." Orochimaru said
With the end of the meeting he walks out and head to his office to finish some paper work before dinner.
Dinner
Sitting in his evil dinning room with his evil china set all up on the walls and his evil fire burning behind him, he sits easily and smiles as he waits for dinner. The servents bring out a massive plate and open it.
"IS THAT A GIANT WHITE SNAKE!!!!" Orochimaru says looking at the massive dead thing that used to be his body.
"YEah we found it laying around and have been preparing it. It was hard to cook but we think its good now."
Orochimaru esscuses himself to his room for an early bed time. He is just getting into bed and about to close his eyes and suddenly.
"ORO-SENSEI!!!!!! WAKE UP WE WANNA TRAIN!!!!!" Say Sachi and Ryoko as they come bounding into Orochimarus room and land right ontop of him.
"GET OUT OF MY ROOM IM TRYING TO SLEEP!!!!!!!!"
"Aww fine, well see you tomorrow."
FIn.
A day in Orochimaru's Layer.
Orochimaru wakes up with his hair going in 15 different directions and his makeup smeared. He looked over and sees a dead deer lieing in bead next to him with a hole in its neck.
"WHEN THE HELL DID THAT GET THERE?!?!?!?!
Oh wait that was dinner last night." He preceeds to swallow the deer hole and walk into the shower. He goes to his private shower room and looks in seeing its destroyed. It has mud everywhere and all sorts of hair on the ground.
"WHOS BEEN USING MY PRIVATE SHOWERRRRR!!!!!!!" He yells as he looks around. He then preceeds to take the next hour waiting outside the regular showers to take one, with every other member of the staff.
"Im Orochimaru I shouldn't haft to stand here waiting to use a damn shower I should be the one to use the shower first. I need to have a meeting about this." He mubbles and a small voice in his head says,
"Yeah like meetings ever solve anything."
"SHUT UP VOICES IN MY HEAD!!!!! Oh wait thats Kabuto, Hay Kabuto can you clean up in their its kinda fogged up."
Suddenly we zoom into Orochimarus brain where Kabuto is finalyl enjoying his vacation away from Orochimaru.
"Aww man I was hoping he'd forget about me. Jees he takes over my body and ya think that would satisfy him enough. But nooo he now wants me to clean his brain. Wait how do you clean a brain."
"Cleaning supplies are in the closet next to you. Make sure the floors are clean." Orochimaru says from outside with everyone stairing at him.
"Floors? Closet?" Kabuto says then suddenly looks around and sees hes in a massive room with a single closet.
"WHEN DID ALL THIS GET IN HERE!?!?!?!?!?!?"
After a very long shower in which Orochimaru spent most of it Fighting his hair to go to normal. He preceeded back to his room to finish the remains of his dear he couldn't swallow and apply his makeup. He walks in to see someone with red eyes in his room.
"Sasuke I see you have returned to finish the job. Well im ready for you cause I have this!!!!"
Holds up naked picture of Sakura.
"Uh Orochimaru why do you have a naked picture of a girl?" Said one of his servents as he flicked on the lights.
"You know I don't really know." Tosses picture away and finishs getting ready. The first part of the morning is always devoted to meetings with the Nobles.
"As you can see we have grown much in power recently and would be honored if you would back USSS!" With that Orochimaru is pushed out of his chair by two little girls, Ryoko and Suchi.
"Chairs? My only weakness?" Orochimaru says as he scrambles to get up.
"Hi Oro-Sensei. When we gonn a TRAIN!!!!!!" The girls say in unison as they run around the desk saying, "Training training, were gonn be training YAY!!!!"
"I AM NOT RUNNING A DAYCARE SERVICE NOW GO BOTHER SOMEONE ELSE!!! Jess i have a whole base and those two haft to come in and bother me." Orochimaru says and suddenly turns around to see the noble dead with his blood being pulled out and into Korikatama Kekkan.
"Kekkan WHY DID YOU KILL THE NOBLE!!!!"
"Don't know, was kinda hugnry for breakfast. You can bring em back can't you? Just do the whole your my slave thing and you get the nobles support."
"THATS NOT THE POI- Oh wait your right, why didn't i think of that. Ah well my Idea now?"
At lunch time Orochimaru went into the office work room, since it was an evil lair there was no kitchen for the regular staff and if people wanted something they bought it themselves. The room was massive with a PS3 in the conner (Though we have yet to figure out how Orochimaru got a PS3 into the Naruo world). On the screen you see Naruto Fighting Orochimaru with two members of the sound 5, Tishaka Suji (the leader) playing Orochimaru and Shibata Bishamon Playing as Naruto.
"I got you Now NARUTO!!!" Yells Suji as he keeps playin the controls.
"Not if i use RASANGAN!!!" Presses buttons and activates rasangan killing Orochimaru.
"Tell me why did I appoint you leader of the sound 5 if you CANT EVEN BEAT YOUR SUBORDINATE IN VIDEO GAMES!!!"
"Uhhh bad character?" Suji says with a look of confusion. "Shoulda Picked Sasuke."
Orochimaru walks to the fridge with an already anoyed look on his face and opens it. He had been craving his massive rice Bowl all day and had cleaned out a massive segment of the fridge specifically devoted to it. Yet again we have no idea how Orochimaru gets these things it just better to not ask.
He opens the fridge to look and side and see his rice bowl missing.
"Oh you have got to be kidding me. KEKKAN!!!!!!!!!" Orochimaru yells.
"Im going to the ramen shop Ill be back later." Orochimaru says as he walks out of the room with Naruto walking on the screen to his Ramen shop.
After a Delicous time at the Ramen shop Orochimaru returns happy and ready to have a base wide meeting.
At the meeting.
"Now I know know you all are wondering why I have called you to this meeting. The answer is simple, someone has been eating ALL OF MY FOOD!!! I dont care who it is, I want them found and brought to me. Hay where did Kekkan go, he was just here a minute ago. That man and his stomach, he must need to eat all the time." Orochimaru said
With the end of the meeting he walks out and head to his office to finish some paper work before dinner.
Dinner
Sitting in his evil dinning room with his evil china set all up on the walls and his evil fire burning behind him, he sits easily and smiles as he waits for dinner. The servents bring out a massive plate and open it.
"IS THAT A GIANT WHITE SNAKE!!!!" Orochimaru says looking at the massive dead thing that used to be his body.
"YEah we found it laying around and have been preparing it. It was hard to cook but we think its good now."
Orochimaru esscuses himself to his room for an early bed time. He is just getting into bed and about to close his eyes and suddenly.
"ORO-SENSEI!!!!!! WAKE UP WE WANNA TRAIN!!!!!" Say Sachi and Ryoko as they come bounding into Orochimarus room and land right ontop of him.
"GET OUT OF MY ROOM IM TRYING TO SLEEP!!!!!!!!"
"Aww fine, well see you tomorrow."
FIn.